Right now
by ms. porcupine
Summary: With Mei's engagement, what will the future hold for the love that she and Yuzu shares? *Contains chapter 35 spoilers*
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note :**

 **Hey , everyone!**

 **I wrote the first two chapters of this fanfic before chapter 36 so it takes a different turn (kind of) from the manga.**

 **Anyway, here it is! I hope you enjoy:)**

"When we do wear them for real , it'd be great if we had matching outfits. "

Hearing those words from Yuzu made Mei's heart leap. The blonde didn't say it directly but she knew what it meant. Her whole being felt warm , she felt happy , so happy that she wanted to cry. She wanted to tell the blonde that she too would want that. They can have the ceremony after they graduate college, they could go to a country that would allow same sex marriage. They could build a family and they would grow old together. Mei smiled at the thought.

But reality hit her like a truck, she knew that building a future with Yuzu is impossible. She has a responsibility. Tears start to pool in her eyes, her usually emotionless face was now filled with tears. Although she always act indifferent towards Yuzu , Mei loves the blonde , she loves her more than anything in the world.

Mei's heart broke , she knew that being with the blonde until the end is impossible. But what hurt her more is the possibility that she would hurt the blonde. Yuzu is the sunlight of her world, she wants nothing more than to make her happy. She loves seeing the blonde smile and thinking that she would be the reason as to why that smile would disappear tore her heart into pieces.

Suddenly, she heard footsteps. She tried to stop the tears from coming but it was futile.

" Mei?" Hearing the blonde's voice made Mei cry harder.

"Mei , oh gosh, are you okay?" Yuzu didn't know what to do , it was the first time that she saw Mei cry like that and a part of her thought that she was the one who caused it. Tears start to pool the blonde's eyes, seeing the raven-haired girl cry pained the blonde.

" Mei , pl-please , stop crying.. Is it my fault?" The blonde asked, her voice full of remorse.

" I'm sorry for forcing you into this. I-I'm so sorry , Mei" Yuzu cried as she held the fabric of her gown between her hands.

Mei looked up at the blonde , she held her face and wiped her tears. She wanted to slap herself for making the blonde cry.

'She's crying for my sake again.' the younger thought as she pressed her forehead on the blonde's shoulder. With her trembling arms , she tightly held the older girl.

Mei wasn't used to feeling open and vulnerable, she has always kept her emotions in check but right now it was as if the feelings she tucked away in her heart were spilling.

" Please forgive me, Yuzu... Please.. stay by my side.. I cannot lose you.." Mei whispered.

" M-Mei?" The blonde was shocked by Mei's words.

" Why are you apologizing?" Yuzu asked as she caressed the younger girl's hair. The raven-haired girl looked up at the blonde's eyes.

" Yuzu , I need you to tell me that you will always stay by my side. Please , I-I need to hear you say it." Mei's eyes were pleading. She knew that she was making a selfish request, but she also knew that she wouldn't know how to continue living without the blonde's warmth.

"What are you talking about, Mei? Of cou-"

"Say it, please." Mei interrupted before the older girl finished.

"No matter what happens I'll always be with you, Mei." Yuzu said as she kissed the younger girl's forehead. She felt confused, she didn't know why Mei was acting like that. She wants to ask the girl what happened, but she didn't want to push her.

Yuzu felt Mei's hands against her cheeks. She looked down and saw the younger girl close the distance between them. She felt Mei's lips against her own.

The kiss was tender and slow. Mei put all of her feelings towards to blonde in that kiss. She kissed her as if she was saying "... I love you"

Yuzu gasped upon hearing Mei's words. It was the first time she heard those words from the younger girl. She felt so happy upon hearing those words , she wanted to jump out of joy. She felt a wide smile spread on her face "Mei , I .." she suddenly stopped and her smile immediately disappeared when she saw Mei's face. It was full of hurt and anguish. Yuzu felt disgusted on herself for feeling happy.

" Yuzu, I love you." Mei repeated. Never once leaving the blonde's eyes. Yuzu felt her heart clench when the younger girl repeated the words. The raven-haired girl didn't love her, if she did, why are her eyes filled with hurt and anguish, the blonde thought.

"I love you so much." The words felt easier to say as she repeated them, but the intensity of her sorrow also became worse. She loves the blonde, but she was about to hurt her. She must marry somebody else, and once the blonde knows this it will tear her.

" Yu-" before Mei could finish Yuzu interrupted her

" Mei.. You don't have to tell me you love me if you don't want to , okay?"

"I can see in your eyes that you're hurting. You don't have to say those words for my sake if it hurts you that much. I'm sorry for pressuring you ,Mei. I really am." Yuzu's eyes were filled with tears once again.

" I love you , Mei. I'm not expecting for anything back. You just being here is already enough." Yuzu said as she pressed her lips against the forehead of the younger girl while tears fell from her eyes.

Mei's heart broke even further. She made the blonde cry once again. But she also felt confused. She doesn't understand what the blonde was talking about. She doesn't get why the blonde won't believe her when she said those words. She loves Yuzu and that is the truth.

" I should tell them that we wouldn't be continuing with the photoshoot" Yuzu told Mei as she wiped her tears. The older girl stood up and started walking.

"Yuzu…" Mei called but the blonde kept walking.

"YUZU!" the girl shouted. The blonde finally stopped walking.

"W-Why.. why would you say that my words are untrue ? I'm telling y-you the truth. I.. Yuzu.. I'm in love with you. " Mei cried, her emotions overflowing.

" I-is it because you deem me as somebody who is i-incapable of love?" Mei accused. She covered her eyes but her tears won't stop falling.

Yuzu felt a pang on her chest upon hearing of Mei's words. Before she realized it she was already running towards the younger girl. When she reached her she immediately pulled her into a tight hug.

"I understand. Please let me go." Mei said as she pushed the older girl away. But Yuzu tightened the hug.

" Mei , I would never think that, okay?" Yuzu whispered.

" You have the most beautiful heart I know."

" Then , why? Why won't you believe my words?" Mei weakly said against the older girl's chest. Her voice sounded hurt.

"Ssshhh.. Mei.. I believe you okay?" Yuzu said as she looked into Mei's eyes. Yuzu felt guilty for hurting the girl and for not believing her. She felt so stupid and useless.

"I'm sorry if I said I didn't, I just feel... insecure." Yuzu admitted.

"I believe you, Mei." Yuzu said as she caressed the younger girl's cheek. " And I love you, too. I love you so much the words can't express it" Yuzu said with her trademark smile. Mei's heart throbbed. She smiled back as she closed the distance between them. She claimed the older girl's lips. She threw away all problems that they soon will face in the back of her head and focused on the kiss.

At that moment, Mei felt as if everything was right. She was with the person she loved the most and they are happy. That's all that matters.


	2. Chapter 2

Yuzu still can't erase the wide grin that is covering her face. She couldn't believe it, Mei actually said that she loves her. She couldn't describe how she was feeling exactly, but it was as if she was floating in air. She felt so happy.

"Yuzu?"

The blonde snapped out of her thoughts when she heard her mom call her.

"You've been staring into space with that wide grin for a while now, what are you thinking about?" her mother asked with a small smile

Yuzu's face immediately blushed at her mother's question. "Oh.. I-its nothing , Mom. I was just thinking about this funny movie I watched with Harumin the other day. Really, it's nothing." The blonde said while waving her head and hands, looking a little too flustered.

Ume squinted her eyes at her daughter's response but just shrugged it off. Yuzu has always been kind of awkward.

"If you say so.. Umm.. by the way, we're out of groceries so could you buy some?" Ume said as she opened their refrigerator to grab herself I can of beer.

"Sure thing, Mom!" Yuzu cheerfully said as she mocked salute her mother.

* * *

"Uwaah.. these groceries are too heavy" Yuzu complained as she struggled to carry the heavy bags full of groceries in her arms.

"Need some help?"

"Aaahhh!" The blonde let out a startled shriek as a certain pink-haired middle schooler appeared in front of her.

"Hey, Yuzu-chan" Matsuri greeted the blonde with a grin.

"Matsuri? What are you doing here?" The blonde was shocked to see her.

The pink-haired girl's grin immediately disappeared and her face suddenly turned serious making the blonde nervous.

"I actually came here to see you , Yuzu-chan. I have something to tell you."

* * *

When the blonde came home she didn't bother to say pleasantries and she nearly threw the groceries at their dinner table. She immediately grabbed the raven-haired girl's arms when she saw her and then she dragged her into their room.

"Is it true, Mei?!" The blonde asked , anger eminent in her voice. She was trying to stay calm but she just couldn't.

" Keep your voice down, Mom is just outside." Mei said firmly as she gestured towards the door.

"Just answer me." Yuzu said. Her voice dripping with spite.

"….. What are you talking about, Yuzu?" the younger girl asked , confused why the other girl was acting like that.

"Is it true that.. that.. you're engaged?" the older girl's voice softened, her voice sounding hurt. Her eyes were starting to pool with tears. She bowed her head, she didn't want Mei to see her face and most of all she didn't want to see Mei's face , she was too afraid to see how the younger girl would react.

Shock immediately registered in Mei's face, but not a moment later her face turned back to its usual form.

"What are you saying, Yuzu? Where did you get that idea from?" Mei sighed.

The blonde raised her head looking directly into the raven-haired girl's eyes. Tears were streaming down her face.

"I heard from Matsuri."

The raven haired girl's eyes widened. " Matsuri? You shouldn't trust that girl, she's just spouting nonsense to stir you."

" That's what I thought,too." Yuzu let out a dry chuckle. " So I went to gramps' house to ask him if it's true, and guess what? Matsuri was right!" The blonde laughed lightly as if to mock herself.

" Yuzu.." Mei wanted to tell the blonde that it wasn't true, but she can't change the fact that it is.

"And here I am , thinking that you actually love me. I'm such a fool..." Yuzu smiled sadly. She should've known that Mei wouldn't come to love someone like her, she was an idiot to believe Mei's words.

"Yuzu , p-please list-" Mei's voice was starting to crack. Tears were threatening to fall from her eyes but she blinked them away.

" Were you planning on keeping this from me? Was it fun to play with the feelings of someone who genuinely loves you?" the blonde glared at Mei , her voice full of accusation.

Mei covered her face with her hand. The tears she was trying so hard to hold started falling. "No , i-it's not like that , Yuzu. I j-just don't want to hurt you."

The blonde laughed fully at the younger girl's excuse. She didn't want to hurt her? The thought of it made the blonde laugh. Wasn't she hurting now? And hiding this from Yuzu wouldn't change the fact that Mei was already engaged, that she's gonna marry somebody else. She was just prolonging the inevitable doom.

"Mei, do I mean that little to you?" Yuzu's eyes reflected her hurt.

Shock registered on the younger girl's face at the blonde's words. She suddenly felt anger rise up in her. She felt angry with herself for making the blonde feel that way , Yuzu meant everything for her but the blonde thought otherwise.

" Why would you even think that? You're the most important person in my life , Yuzu." Mei said sternly. She stared at Yuzu with unwavering eyes.

Yuzu avoided the younger girl's gaze. " Stop lying , Mei." Yuzu scowled at Mei.

"Look me in the eye and tell me if I'm lying. I'm telling the truth , Yuzu." Mei said softly to Yuzu.

Yuzu felt irritated at Mei's words. She looked back at the younger girl's eyes with a fierce gaze.

"Then prove it."

Mei's eyebrows creased at the blonde's words.

"Break off the engagement if what you're saying is the truth." The blonde challenged.

Mei was taken aback by the blonde's words. She can't break off the engagement, she decided to carry the weight of the Aihara name and she wouldn't think ,even for a second, that she would run away from that responsibility.

"I'm not capable of doing that , I can't and I won't run away from my responsibility."

Yuzu smirked at Mei's words. What did she expect? That Mei would choose her over the academy, over the Aihara family? That's just wishful thinking.

She felt anger towards the younger girl , she wanted to slap the girl and shout at her but it immediately diminished once she saw the girl's face. It was full of emotion. Guilt , conflict , anger and most especially anguish was plastered across the girl's face. Yuzu's heart instantly softened. She couldn't stay angry towards the other girl even if she tried, she loves the girl too much.

"I'm so stupid, Mei. Even though, I already know that you're just toying with me , why is it that I still love you." Yuzu said quietly, as if she was talking to herself.

"Yuzu , I'm n-"

"You already knew , right? When we started our relationship, you already knew that you're gonna be engaged." Yuzu said with a sad voice , it was as if she already had admitted defeat.

Mei was about to say something but she immediately stopped. The blonde was right ,despite knowing that she'll have to marry somebody else , she still started a relationship with her. The younger girl bowed her head , she was too ashamed to show her face to Yuzu. She already knew but she was just too selfish, too desperate for the older girl's warmth. She let her emotions get the better of herself, that in the end she ended up hurting not only herself but also Yuzu.

"Why are you so stupid? stupid. Stupid. Stupid."

Mei raised her head only to see Yuzu hitting her own chest while saying words to mock herself. Mei couldn't help but feel immense sadness when she saw what the girl was doing. She immediately went near the blonde to stop her from hitting herself.

"Y-Yuzu , please stop." Mei said as she wrapped the blonde into a tight embrace.

The blonde resisted the embrace , only to get herself more entangled into it. Suddenly she stopped struggling , she let herself melt into the hug. "I love you , Mei. I love you so much." Yuzu said as she hugged Mei back.

Mei got flustered by the blonde's words but she immediately replied " I love you ,too." She tightened her embrace as she buried her face on the blonde's neck.

"I love you , Mei. That's why we should end this"

Disbelief covered Mei's face. She raised her head to look into the older girl's eyes

" Wh-what are you saying?" Mei asked with a wounded voice.

Yuzu cupped Mei's face, she used her thumbs to wipe the tears from the girl's face " I don't want to put you in a position where you are forced to make a decision. I don't want you to feel guilty in the whatever choice you'll have to make."

"Y-Yuzu.. You swore t-that you would..." The girl said as she removed Yuzu's hand on her face. She looked directly at the blonde expecting to see a bit of hesitation but all she saw was the resolve in the girl's eyes.

" Yuzu..P-please don't.." Mei pleaded, her face full of tears.

"I don't want to hold you back , Mei." Yuzu was trying her best to stop herself from crying. She acted as if everything was okay but on the inside, she was actually quite a mess.

Mei was crying so much that words can't even come out of her mouth

Yuzu let out a small chuckle " You always act so tough but you're actually a big softy. Look, your nose is running." Yuzu said as she wiped Mei's face with her hands, she used her fingers to comb Mei's now messy hair.

"There. Now you look so much better." Yuzu said with a radiant smile.

Mei was still crying hard but she forced herself to speak "Yu.. zu.. I-I.. need.. y-you..P-please…" Mei begged as she grabbed Yuzu's shoulders. The girl nearly kneeled but the blonde immediately stopped her.

Seeing the younger girl like that pained Yuzu. She wanted to just give in and tell lies to the younger girl , she wanted to tell her that everything is gonna be okay but in fact it is never gonna be. She was doing this not to hurt Mei but to make things easier for her. She loves Mei and she would give up anything for her, even her own happiness.

"I'm doing this for your own good." Yuzu said as she lovingly kissed the younger girl's forehead.

"Yuzu..please..I can't.." Mei repeatedly pleaded against the blonde's chest.

Yuzu tightened the hug as Mei continued to plead. She didn't want to hurt the girl but she didn't have a choice, it was for the younger girl's own sake. 'This is for the best' she thought as she tenderly kissed the top of the younger girl's head.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:**

 **Hey, everyone! It's already the 3rd chapter of my fan fiction. It was supposed to be a one-shot but this and that happened so..yeah.**

 **I know this story is far from perfect and kinda lame but please bear with me , it's my first time to write a story.**

 **Thank you so much for reading this.**

 **PS: I'm still sad about chapter 36, I really thought that Mei would choose Yuzu over the Aihara household but I was hella wrong. Damn you, Saburouta!**

* * *

Yuzu woke up with a tear on her face, she chuckled lightly before wiping the tear away.

"I must've dreamt of her again."

She was already used to waking up with a painful feeling against her chest. Ever since Mei left , Yuzu felt a hole inside her appear and each day that passes it gets bigger and bigger. She was starting to feel empty inside.

It was her choice to let go of Mei , she thought that it was the right thing to do and until now she still thinks that it is. But it doesn't mean that she wasn't hurting. Every now and then she would remember the moments she had with Mei. It was filled with wonderful memories but it also contained sorrow. Yuzu found it kinda funny how the good memories she had with Mei hurts as much as the bad memories , heck , they even hurt more.

Before she saw it coming, thoughts from the night before Mei left flooded her mind, she started to feel the familiar pang of pain against her chest.

 _Flashback_

 _It has already been over a month since Yuzu broke up with Mei. Ever since that night the blonde became a shadow of her former self. She became less cheerful and she would always have a lonely look in her eyes._

 _But Yuzu tried her best to act normal around Mei. She wanted to become the older sister she was supposed to be ,but every time she tried to approach the younger girl , she would either ignore her or avoid her. Mei wouldn't even meet the blonde's eyes. Even if they went to the same school, lived in the same house and slept in the same bed, Mei acted as if Yuzu didn't exist. The raven-haired girl has built bigger and stronger walls around her heart and Yuzu wasn't strong enough to break them._

 _Despite this , the blonde didn't want to give up. She believes that she can get through Mei's walls like she did in the past , and even if she can't get through it , she wanted to leave at least a crack._

 _Yuzu smiled slightly at the cake in front of her. Today was Mei's birthday and Yuzu has baked a cake for the girl in an attempt to surprise her. Even the slightest reaction from Mei would make the blonde extremely happy._

 _'I hope she likes it' , the blonde thought._

 _The blonde let out a small yelp when she heard the door knob of their front door turn. She immediately lighted the candles on top of the cake and went in front of the door while holding the cake._

 _"Mei, Happy Birthday!" Yuzu greeted the younger girl with a radiant smile. The blonde was holding a chocolate cake , the numbers 1 and 7 were lighted on top of it and a clumsily written birthday greeting was written on its surface._

 _"I tried my best to make this, I hope you like it, Mei." Yuzu said with a slight blush on her face._

 _The raven-haired girl stared blankly at the cake for a split second before she continued walking towards their room. The younger girl had ignored her. The blonde just realized what had happened when she heard their room's door close._

 _Yuzu felt frozen. But the older girl isn't one for giving up , she immediately followed the younger girl to their room. When she opened the door , Mei was already changing into her pajamas._

 _"Mei, since it's your birthday you should make a wish. Come on, blow the candles." Yuzu said cheerfully as she approached the younger girl but she didn't respond._

 _"Please, Mei, it's your special day!" The blonde continued not seeming to be affected by the raven-haired girl's lack of response._

 _"Come on, Mei~" Yuzu said as she tapped the other girl's shoulder. Mei flinched at the sudden touch._

 _"Enough!" the younger girl shouted as she slapped Yuzu's hand away. The movement caused Yuzu to lose her balance, the cake she was holding on her other hand fell down on the floor. The older girl was so startled by Mei's unexpected outburst that it took a few moments before she realized that the cake fell down._

 _Yuzu frowned at the mess beneath her feet,she knelt down to clean it. Tears were starting to form in her eyes but she just wiped them away. If she cried now she wouldn't be able to stop._

 _"Sorry, Mei. I didn't mean to annoy you, I just wanted to suprise you 'cause it's your birthday." Yuzu said as she threw the mess that was supposed to be Mei's birthday day cake in the garbage bin. The blonde felt sad that Mei didn't get to taste the cake she worked so hard for but it was alright, Yuzu already knew that it was a futile attempt. At least, she got a reaction from Mei. It was the first time in the past month that the younger girl had given the older girl any kind of response. Even though it was out of anger, the blonde felt relieved._

 _Yuzu stared blankly at the cake in the garbage bin , without warning tears fell from the blonde's eyes. She felt confused as to why she was crying, she thought that she would feel happy if she got any kind of response from Mei but the younger girl's violent reaction has affected her more than she admitted. Yuzu angrily wiped the tears away but they continued flowing. She hated the fact that something as simple as that made her cry this much. Maybe it was because she loved the other girl too much._

 _Yuzu inhaled deeply , she tried to stop the tears but they kept on flowing and flowing. And like the tears in her eyes the feelings and insecurities she had in the past month came flowing out of her. It was as if the ruined cake that she baked turned into a trigger that released all the things she locked up inside._

 _"Are you mad at me, Mei?" the blonde asked with a weak voice._

 _"D-do you hate me?" the blonde continued with a weaker voice, almost like a whisper. She didn't even know if the raven haired girl was actually there to listen but she continued to talk._

 _"M-Mei, it's okay if you hate but please d-don't act as if I don't even exist." Yuzu's voice started to crack._

 _"I-It hurts so m-much, Mei. Do y-you h-hate me s-so much that the mere thought of associating w-with me r-repulsed you?" The blonde said closed her eyes as she clenched her chest. Her heart was hurting too much._

 _"Do you even know how much I love you? Maybe if you knew you'll be creeped out." Yuzu let out a dry chuckle._

 _"I love you, Mei. I love you so much." The older girl said the words softly. Despite how much her heart hurts, she still felt so much love towards Mei. ' I really am an idiot." Yuzu told her self._

 _"Then , why? Why did you break up with me?" Yuzu almost jumped when she heard Mei's voice. She didn't expect that the younger girl was actually there. She turned around only to be met by Mei's tear filled eyes._

 _"When I said that I needed you why did you reject me?" Mei asked softly , it was almost as if she was afraid of Yuzu's answer._

 _"Please understand that I only did what I did because it was the right thing to do for the both of us." Yuzu said as she looked at Mei. She resisted the urge to hug the raven haired girl ._

 _"All I wanted was for you to stay by my side but you didn't even do that." Mei said sternly even though tears were falling from her eyes._

 _"S-stay by your side?" Yuzu asked Mei with disbelief._

 _"U-until when? Until y-you get m-married?! Until you h-have children ?! Until you r-realize that y-you're tired of me?!" The older girl angrily shouted in between her sobs. She was crying so much that she found it hard to breathe._

 _"I-I k-know ,Mei. That you never even considered to choose me. I know that even if we continued our relationship you will eventually throw me away." Yuzu looked directly into Mei's eyes. She laughed lightly at what she saw. Guilt. Mei's eyes were filled with guilt. And to think that she actually hoped that Mei would deny it. Yuzu let out a small laugh once again._

 _"I'm only human ,Mei. I also have my limits" Yuzu said. Her voice was filled with tiredness. It was as if she has already given up._

 _"Did you even think what will become of me if I chose to stay by your side? Mei, are you that selfish?" Yuzu's voice dripped with disappointment._

 _The raven-haired girl fell silent. The blonde was right , she was selfish. She was so full of herself , she only thought about things that would help her. The younger girl realized then that she didn't deserve Yuzu. That someone as wretched as her didn't deserve the blonde. Yuzu is everything that she is not and unconsciously she took advantage of her. The raven haired girl couldn't help but feel disgust towards herself._

 _Tears start to fall from the younger girl's eyes. She used her hands to cover her face , she felt too ashamed to face Yuzu._

 _Shock filled the raven haired girl when she felt warm arms wrap around her. She didn't expect that the blonde would hold her._

 _"I'm so sorry, Mei.I didn't mean to.. I-I just couldn't help it."Yuzu said as she tightened the hug which made Mei cry even harder. She buried her face on the blonde's chest as she wrapped her arms around the other girl's back. It was a selfish move but she was too desperate for the older girl's warmth. She breathed-in the older girl's scent and listened to her heart. The sensation made the younger girl sigh with content. Even if everything else was wrong , this moment was the only thing that felt right, Mei thought._

 _"I hope you find happiness, Mei. I know you'll get over me soon enough." Yuzu whispered. "I'm **just** Yuzu afterall." The blonde said with a small smile._

 _' 'just' Yuzu?' Mei repeated that blonde's words on her mind. She didn't understand why the blonde felt that uncertain towards herself but it suddenly hit her. She didn't want to admit it but she knew that she was probably the reason why blonde felt so insecure. She never really showed how much she felt towards the blonde until it was too late. Mei mentally slapped herself, her lack of honesty towards her feelings has hurt the blonde. ' Am I only good at hurting Yuzu?' Mei asked herself sadly._

 _"Yuzu." Mei called. Yuzu looked down on the younger girl._

 _Mei slowly closed the distance between them , Yuzu turned her head to avoid the kiss , she knew that it wasn't right but Mei held her cheek. Mei's kiss was desperate and it took every ounce of Yuzu's will in order not to kiss the girl back but she eventually gave in. Yuzu kissed Mei back with just as much desperation. They were out of breathe when the kiss ended._

 _When they caught their breathe Mei once again closed the distance between them , this time the kiss was tender and slow. When they parted Yuzu saw Mei's eyes bursting with love._

 _"Yuzu , I love you so much." She whispered as she gently kissed Yuzu's forehead._

The very next day of that night Mei left and never returned.

Yuzu shut her eyes close in order to erase the thoughts but it was futile. She immediately stood up from her bed and went to the bathroom sink to splash water against her face. She tried her best to put the thoughts behind but Mei's words kept repeating on her mind. It was supposed to be a beautiful memory but for Yuzu it was a painful sight, almost too painful to bear. A part of her wanted to just run to the raven-haired girl and tell her that she would stay by her side. She wanted to just forget everything else and be with the younger girl, but even if she did that she knew that nothing would change. She heard somewhere that Mei was already living with Udagawa , the two must've been already married she thought. Yuzu has already accepted that she and Mei would never end up together but despite this she still can't help but feel grief. She dreamed of building a future with Mei countless of times , she knew that it will be hard but it wasn't impossible, but now, every ounce of chance that it will come true vanished. She raised her head to look at the mirror.

"It had already been 3 years, when will you get over her?" she asked her reflection. Before she knew it, tears started flowing from her eyes. She was already getting tired of always crying but what can she do? She still loves Mei more than anything else . She thought that time would heal her , that it would make her forget but she was wrong. The more time she spent away from Mei , the more she fell for her. It was stupid, but she loves Mei more now than before.

The blonde clenched her chest in an attempt to ease the pain but it was useless.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's note:**

 **It's my finals on Thursday so I really should be studying right now but I really like procrastinating so instead of reviewing my notes , I wrote chapter 4 of my fan fic XD**

* * *

 _Mei wrapped her hand around the ring on her neck. She closed her eyes as she felt the cold metal touch her skin. Though the ring was cold, it filled her whole being with a glowing warmth ._

 _She_ _smiled slightly when she remembered the night Yuzu gave her the ring. The raven-haired girl recalled how she cried when the blonde put the ring around finger. During that time she felt lost , she didn't know what was the reason behind her own tears. It was like a puzzle she couldn't solve._

 _But now , she realized why she shed those tears. It was because the gesture filled her with so much happiness that her feelings overflowed in the form of tears. The raven-haired girl wasn't used to receiving that much love, she was already accustomed to the emptiness of her heart but Yuzu filled the void with her honest feelings. She was so clueless back then, she didn't even realize how hard she has fallen for the girl. But when she did realize the extent of how much she felt towards the blonde, it was already too late._

 _The raven-haired girl's slight smile disappeared when her thoughts turned to the afternoon before that night. During that afternoon in the library, Yuzu has told Mei her insecurities about their relationship and in that same afternoon Mei told Yuzu a terrible lie that would soon break the blonde's heart. Mei can still vividly remember the smile Yuzu has given her when she told the blonde that it was okay for her to love her. It made the raven-haired girl's heart throb with so much guilt but at the same time, it reminded her of much she loved the blonde. She would do anything to turn that lie into the truth._

 _Mei held the ring tighter. With it around her neck, she felt as if Yuzu was with her. It gave her the courage she needed to face her grandfather. The girl was in front of her grandfather's study. Every step she took to reach her grandfather's home felt heavy but she has already decided that she would do this._

 _After the fight she had with Yuzu the night before, she decided that she would confront her grandfather. In the past she wasn't brave enough , but Yuzu made her realize what she was supposed to do. The raven-haired girl has decided that she would tell her grandfather all of her feelings including what she felt for the blonde. She would tell him that she can't continue with the engagement but she still would want to inherit the Aihara academy. She knew that even without getting married to Udagawa, she would still be a suitable heir for the Aihara academy. But knowing her grandfather , Mei knew that he would probably vehemently reject the idea, being as stoic as he is._

 _Mei sighed deeply. Her face betrayed nothing but she felt so afraid. Her knees felt weak and her arms were shaking. A part of her wanted to just turn away and be the coward that she is but she wanted to become someone who deserved the blonde's love. This was the first step into achieving that. With her trembling hand's she softly knocked on the door in front of her._

Mei stared blankly at the cup of tea in front of her. She was sitting beside Udagawa , and they were inside the apartment they shared. Udagawa was talking to her but her mind was else where. Her thoughts lingered on the past.

Mei could clearly remember how mad her grandfather was when she told him about her relationship with Yuzu. His face was full of anger and disgust. He never would have thought that his perfect granddaughter would be queer. He refused to believe that she is. The old man accused that Yuzu brainwashed Mei. He even threatened that he would expel the blonde. The man said many terrible things to mock Yuzu. The raven-haired girl defended Yuzu with everything she had. During that time, Mei felt the gnawing urge to slap his grandfather but of course, she didn't. If someone deserved to be mocked it was her not Yuzu.

The old man didn't want to acknowledge Mei's feelings toward Yuzu as love. He said that he would never accept such insolence. Mei's grandfather spat words like disgusting, crazy, degenerate and mentally-ill. He ridiculed what Mei considered as love. The man told her that it was just her hormones playing with her. He even asked Mei to see a psychologist. The man told her that she shouldn't get swept by her emotions because the Aihara household was depending on her. They needed a heir, and Mei was the only one who can fill that position.

At that moment, Mei felt as if her world crumbled. The future she had imagined where Yuzu was there with her disappeared. She shouldn't have gotten her hopes up, she was so ridiculously idealistic to the point that it was stupid. She had her doubts, but she thought that there was a slight chance that her grandfather would accept.

After the 'talk' they had, Mei's grandfather hastened the pace of the wedding preparations. He wanted the ceremony to happen as soon as possible. He was desperate to straighten Mei out. He even ordered Mei to cut ties with Yuzu and her Mom.

The raven-haired girl didn't want to follow her grandfather's order. If she could, she would want to stay with Yuzu for the rest of her life but she knew that she can't. She just can't. She couldn't possibly turn away from the man who took care of her until she grew up. He acted as Mei's parent when her father left her behind. The old man was the only guardian Mei had when his father disappeared. She owes the man too much and the only way she could compensate from this is to follow his wishes.

"Aihara-san."

Mei snapped out of her thoughts when she heard Udagawa call her.

"Yes?" Mei gave the man an uninterested look.

"Are you feeling okay?" the man asked her with a concerned look.

" I am." Mei said.

The raven-haired girl clenched her teeth as she stared angrily at the wedding ring around her finger.


	5. Chapter 5

3 years. 3 years have already passed since Mei last saw Yuzu. 3 years since she felt the blonde's warmth, 3 long years since she last felt the older girl's lips against her own. Unconsciously, Mei held her lips.

She closed her eyes shut as she remembered the last kiss she shared with Yuzu. Mei remembered how soft the blonde's lips were, how she wrapped her hand against the girl's hair to pull her closer ,and how the blonde caressed the raven- haired girl's back when their kissed deepened. The kiss was so achingly tender but it was bursting with the feelings they had for each other.

The girl closed her eyes tighter as she felt the tears come. She terribly missed the blonde. Mei couldn't even begin to describe how much she longed for Yuzu. Every moment she spent away from the girl was torture. The girl didn't know how she managed to survive that long without Yuzu by her side.

A day didn't pass without her thinking of the blonde. No matter what she did, her mind would always wonder towards the older girl. Everytime she closes her eyes , she would see the blonde smiling at her, she would remember the memories they shared together. She cherished those memories dearly but they remind her of what she had lost. Mei would give everything to relive those moments.

Mei always hoped and prayed that the blonde has already moved on from her. She doesn't want the older girl to be trapped by the past, trapped by the terrible memories Mei has given her. More than anything else , she wants the girl to be happy. She wants the girl to be filled with the joy , that is the wish she desired the most.

Sometimes , though the thought pained her so much, Mei would even wish that Yuzu would fall in love again. She wanted the blonde to experience a love that would fill her with happiness not sorrow, she wanted the blonde to love someone that truly deserved her. Mei bit her bottom lip. She knew from the beginning that that someone wasn't her, and will never be her.

The raven-haired girl put her hand on the top of her blouse. Despite her separation from Yuzu , Mei still always wore the ring that the older girl had given her. It sometimes eases the pain she feels , the ring makes her feel as if Yuzu was there with her.

" Yuzu please be happy." Mei whispered as she clenched the ring.

She sighed deeply as she returned to the pile of paper works in front of her. Her mind had lingered too long that she almost forgot the work she had to do.

In addition to being a university student, Mei also helped her grandfather in some aspects of the Aihara academy. Mei's grandfather has already grown so weak, he couldn't manage to handle the academy on his own.

After her marriage, Mei became the puppet of her grandfather. He controlled everything in Mei's life, but the raven-haired girl never complained. She has already accepted the fact that she wouldn't be able to make her own choices for the rest of her life.

Mei momentarily stopped doing her work when she heard a soft knock on her room's door.

"Come in." The girl said .

The blank expression on her face didn't change when she saw Udagawa open the door.

" You've already been working for hours , you should take some rest." The man said with a hint of concern in his voice.

" Here. I brought you tea." The man gave Mei a cup of Chamomile tea. The raven-haired stared at it blankly for a second before she accepted it.

"Thank you." Mei said as she placed the tea on top of her desk.

"Is there something else you need? If not, then you may go." Mei said coldly as she continued her work.

Udagawa sighed lightly at the girl's cold attitude but at least she accepted the tea. Mei would often reject or ignore anything that came from the man.

It had been already almost 3 years since he and Mei got married and started living together, but his relationship with the younger girl never progressed. She still acted as if he was some kind of stranger. Udagawa wished that the girl would open up to him, he is her husband after all, but he knew that it would take some more time before that would happen. He wanted to be a good husband to the girl, that's the least he can do, but Mei never gave him a chance to.

Mei always wears a blank expression but there were times that the man saw the girl with a lonely look in her eyes. Sometimes, he would even hear the girl cry at night. They didn't share the same bedroom but their rooms were close enough for the man to hear Mei's sobs. Whenever he heard the younger girl's cry, he would immediately go in front of her room to ask if she was okay but the girl never answered. He was always tempted to open the door to try and console the girl but he didn't want to over step his boundaries.

He wondered what can possibly make a girl as strong as Mei cry that much. He felt guilty because a part of him knew that their arranged marriage was probably one of the reasons behind Mei's tears.

" If there's nothing else that you want to say , you can leave now." Mei said sternly. Though she was facing the pile of work in front of her , her annoyance was obvious.

Udagawa pinched his lips together before handing Mei an envelope.

"Here. It's from the mail, it is addressed to you."

Mei eyed the mail with her usual blank expression before accepting it.

"Is that all?" Mei asked as she turned her head to face the man.

"Yes. That's all." Udagawa gave Mei a small smile before he left the room.

* * *

Yuzu played with her blonde hair as she and Harumin walked towards their university. Her mind darted towards the night when Mei reassured her that it was okay for her to keep it that way. Yuzu clenched her teeth , even her own hair reminded her of the younger girl.

"Harumin, do you think black hair would suit me?"

"Eeeeeeehhhh?" Harumin felt shocked from the blonde's sudden question.

" I think a change would be nice." The blonde said as she turned her head towards her friend.

The brunette squinted her eyes at the girl beside her. The blonde's eyes were filled with sadness.

Harumin doesn't remember when it started but she noticed how her best friend would always have a lonely look in her eyes. The blonde acted her usual cheery self but her eyes would tell a different a story.

The brunette knew that something was wrong with the blonde but she never asked her about it. Of course, Harumin wanted to know what was wrong with her best friend but she knew that it was something that the blonde wouldn't want to talk about. If she did, she would have immediately told Harumin about it.

Instead of pushing answers out of the blonde, the brunette waited patiently for Yuzu to approach her herself , but the girl never did. Harumin wondered if the blonde didn't trust her enough or maybe she didn't trust her at all.

"Yuzuchii, honestly -" before she could even continue , Yuzu had placed a finger on top of her lips.

"Noooope, nada. You're not gonna change my mind , I've already decided." the blonde said with a wide smile that contrasted the sad look in her eyes.

"But-" Harumin tried to say something as she removed the finger from her lips but Yuzu once again interrupted her.

" I'm gonna dye my hair black!" The blonde said as she pumped her fist with a determined look on her face.

The brunette sighed deeply as she looked at the blonde with a serious expression."Yuzuchii..do you t-" she felt hesitation fill her.

"Hmm?" Yuzu hummed.

" You know what , never mind." Harumin said with a defeated look in her eyes.

The blonde raised her eyebrow at her best friend. She felt curious as to what the girl was trying to say but she knew that even if she prodded her the brunette will just keep her mouth shut.

The two girls continued to walk towards their university without uttering a single word with each other. Every now and then ,Yuzu would glance over her friend to try and talk to her , but Harumin appeared to be in deep thought.

After a few more minutes the two parted ways and went to their respective classes.

Yuzu has taken Fashion Design as her course, the blonde has always loved fashion and she wanted pursue it.

When she reached the room , she hurriedly sat at the free sit at the back of her class. 'Lucky~' she thought.

When their professor entered the room she immediately took out her notebook and pen from her bag. The blonde placed her notebook on top of the desk but she can't seem to find her pen.

She rummaged her bag but it was nowhere to be found. She felt her face flush when she realized that she left her it in their apartment.

'You're so stupid, Yuzu.' She mentally scolded herself.

She could always borrow a pen from her classmates but it would be too embarrassing. What kind of idiot would forget to bring their pen to class.

"Here." The blonde almost let out a shriek when she suddenly heard a voice.

She turned her head and saw girl a offering her a pen. She has red hair and silver eyes. Even though she was seated , it was obvious that the girl was petite.

"Umm..Thanks?" Yuzu reluctantly accepted the pen. She didn't even say anything but the girl knew that she needed it. 'Was I that obvious?' Yuzu thought.

The blonde's eyes widened when she saw the pen clearly. She felt excitement fill her "OMG! Is this the limited edition Yuzubocchi pen?!"

"Are you a fan of Yuzubocchi too?" the blonde expectantly looked at the girl.

The redhead was taken back at the blonde's enthusiasm but she felt a wide smile spread across her face " Yeah!" she replied.

The girl made a gesture. It was as if she was telling Yuzu to come closer. The blonde felt a bit confused but she did what the other girl asked.

"Keep it a secret but I have a collection of every Yuzubocchi merchandise. You can have it if you want, I have an extra at home." The short girl whispered against her ear.

"Really?" She looked at the girl beside her , her eyes were practically sparkling.

"Of course." The redhead couldn't help but smile at the girl's reaction.

" Thank you so much!" Yuzu said as she hugged the shorter girl. The blonde was acting overly familiar but the redhead didn't mind. She found the other girl's cheerfulness infectious.

" Oh , I didn't even ask your name." Yuzu said as she released the girl form her hug ."By the way, I'm Aihara Yuzu." She said as she pointed her index finger towards herself.

"Yuzu?" The redhead asked."No wonder you like Yuzubocchi that much, you even have the same name!" She said with a small chuckle.

"I'm Midori Nami." The girl introduced herself with a smile.

"What a pretty name!" Yuzu exclaimed as she clasped her hands together.

"Nami , huh...Then I'll call you Naa-chan!" Yuzu said cheerfully, satisfied at the nickname she had given the other girl.

When the class ended the blonde immediately invited her new found friend to lunch. She wanted to treat Nami as pay back for the pen that the girl had given her.

"It's kinda weird,but I never saw you in class before." Yuzu said before she put a spoonful of rice in her mouth.

" I guess I don't really give off that much presence." The girl replied with a small smile.

" I don't think that's it." The blonde said once she swallowed the food that she was eating.

" Hmmm... " Yuzu put her fingers on her chin as if she was in deep thought. She snapped her fingers when an idea popped in her mind.

" Maybe it's because your small." Yuzu said with a wide grin.

Nami frowned at the blonde's words."How mean." She said as she pouted her lips and crossed her arms.

The blonde immediately laughed at the short girl's reaction. It was actually kind of cute, she thought.

"I'm kidding , I'm kidding." She said as she patted the top of the girl's head.

" But I already noticed you since the beginning of the semester." The redhead said as she removed the taller girl's hand on top of her head.

" Your hair kinda makes you stand out." The girl said as she pointed at the blonde's hair.

"Not in a bad way though." Nami said with a small smile.

The smile Yuzu was wearing disappeared.

"My hair , huh?" She said as she put a lock of her hair between her fingers. Once again, her mind traveled to the past. Yuzu closed her eyes tightly, she didn't want to remember.

"Actually , I'm gonna go to a salon this afternoon to dye in back to its original color." The blonde said as she let go of her hair, her sadness was apparent in her voice.

The redhead didn't fail to notice the sudden change in the mood of the other girl. She had only met the girl hours ago but seeing her unhappy also made her feel sad. She wanted to at least try and cheer the girl up.

"If it's alright, can I come with you?" the girl asked.

* * *

" Uwaaaah, this feels so weird. I haven't had dark hair since I was little." Yuzu said as she played her newly dyed hair between her fingers.

Nami couldn't help but laugh at the former blonde's face. Yuzu's frown was so big that it almost formed an upside-down 'U'.

Yuzu turned her head to look at the girl beside her."You're even laughing at me." Yuzu said as her frown grew deeper.

Nami laughed even harder.

"Y-your f-face."

"L-let m-me take a p-photo." Nami said in between her laughter. She tried her best to still her trembling hands as she took a photo of Yuzu's face.

" Aihara-san , you're killing me." The shorter girl said as she gleefully stared at the picture she took.

Yuzu scooted over behind the shorter girl to peek at her photo. Once she saw it, the blonde instantly let out a hearty laugh. Her face looked so ridiculous that she couldn't control her laughter. She didn't mind if she was being loud or obnoxious. She hasn't laughed this much for the longest time , she almost has forgotten how it felt.

Mei had just bought groceries and she was about to return to their apartment when her eyes caught a familiar figure amidst the crowd.

the raven-haired girl almost dropped the bag of groceries she was holding when she saw Yuzu. She couldn't believe her eyes, she almost thought that she was dreaming but her throbbing heart made her realize that she wasn't.

The girl was slightly taller now , and her features were more mature. The once blonde hair the girl had was now black, but her green eyes were still as beautiful as Mei remembered. They were still the same eyes she has fallen in love with.

The raven-haired girl put her hand against her chest, her heart was beating so hard. Seeing the older girl after all time she spent away from her filled Mei with a myriad of emotions. It was as if there was a storm of emotions inside of her. She didn't know how to describe it ,but she felt love,joy,sadness, longing,guilt, and loneliness all at the same time. But the most persistent emotion she felt was desire. She wanted to feel the older girl's warmth against her skin, she wanted to wrap her arms around the girl's frame and she wanted to feel the girl's lips against her own so badly. Every cell of her body screamed for her to run towards the older girl and hold her around arms but the raven-haired girl resisted the urge. She knew that she musn't.

Mei felt a twinge of jealousy when she noticed that the older girl was with another girl.'A friend? A lover?' Mei wondered. Before she knew it , she had started walking towards the direction of the two girls. Whenever she was jealous,Mei had the tendency to become wreckless, her emotions clouds her sensibility.

The raven-haired girl felt her jealousy immediately disappear and be replaced by sincere happiness when she saw Yuzu laugh. Seeing the girl smile filled Mei with the warmth she hasn't felt for a long time. She couldn't help but also smile.

The younger girl turned away from Yuzu "I'm glad." Mei whispered as she felt tears fall from her eyes.

The raven-haired girl walked towards the direction of her apartment while crying and smiling at the same time. People around her gave her weird looks but it doesn't matter , she was just so relieved to see that her former lover was doing well, that she was happy.

"I'm s-so g-glad." The girl covered her mouth to stop her sobs. She felt her knees weaken , she might breakdown anytime so she hastened the pace of her walk.

"M-Mei?"

Suddenly, she stopped on her tracks when she heard Yuzu's voice call her.

* * *

Author's Note:

 **Hello, everyone! Thank you so much for reviewing on my fan fic, they really mean a lot to me! And thank you for following and favoriting this story, you guys are the best!**

 **PS: I also feel like crying whenever I write my fan fic because I can vividly see the scenarios in my mind. _But , I don't hate pain_ ... XD.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Happy Easter and happy april fool's , everyone!**

* * *

" Aihara-san, are you there?" Nami said as she waved her hands in front of Yuzu's face.

The girl suddenly stopped laughing and was staring off into space. The redhead followed Yuzu's gaze but there was nothing in particular that stood out that might've caught the taller girl's attention.

Yuzu's world stopped. It was as if time went still, the noises that surround her muted and the people around halted , all except for one.

The girl has her back turned , but Yuzu knew that it was her. She knew from the way the girl walked, how her silky hair swayed with every step she took and how her aura just screams the word "dignified".

Tears spilled from the former blonde's eyes , but it wasn't out of sorrow or sadness. It was because she truly felt happy. When she saw the raven-haired girl it was as if the three years she spent crying and hurting all just disappeared.

"M-Mei?" Yuzu called.

She saw the girl stop on her tracks. Yuzu took a step, then another. Before she knew it she was already running towards the girl.

When she reached her , she immediately pulled her into a tight hug. Yuzu felt afraid that it was just an illusion or a trick made by her brain, but as she felt the younger girl's warmth against her skin she knew that it was real.

"I-I missed you s-so much." She said as she buried her face against Mei's neck.

Even after all the time that Yuzu spent away from the raven-haired girl , she still had the same effect on her. Her heart still beats so hard whenever Mei was near her and she still feels so much love towards the other girl.

Yuzu tightened the hug. She never even dared to dream that she will see Mei once again, but right now the girl was actually there with her, wrapped between her arms. The moment felt surreal.

" I c-can't believe y-you're here." Yuzu whispered.

Tears were still falling from her eyes but she didn't give an effort to stop them from coming, she just felt too happy to care about anything else.

The raven-haired girl felt frozen. She didn't know what to do. A part of her prompted her to pull away from the former blonde's embrace but another part of her wanted to just give in.

Everything was just too overwhelming that she felt lost, the moment felt so right and so wrong at the same time, she felt so confused. Her mind was a mess but she was sure of one thing. She knew that she was never truly alive without Yuzu by her side.

She hesitated at first but the raven-haired girl slowly wrapped her arms around Yuzu's back. She let out a sigh once she felt the other girl's frame against her arms.

Mei closed her eyes. She let herself indulge in the moment. The girl engraved how the moment felt on her mind. She knew that it wouldn't last forever.

All too soon she felt the older girl pull away from the hug , but instead of letting go the younger girl held Yuzu tighter.

Mei knew that she was being irrational, that she was being controlled but her emotions once again but she didn't care. The raven-haired girl's mind merely focused on the fact that she was with the person she loves the most.

"Just a while longer." Mei whispered as she buried her head against Yuzu's chest. She listened to older girl's heartbeat, like her own it was beating like crazy but the sound made the raven-haired girl feel at ease.

"Eeeh? umm.. o-okay." the older girl said awkwardly but complied. She rested her cheek on the side of the younger girl's head as she held the girl closer.

Tears fell from the younger girl's eyes. She never would have thought that she would feel Yuzu's warmth once more or that Yuzu would hold her like that ever again. After everything that she did, the younger girl expected to receive hatred from Yuzu. She expected that the former blonde would treat her with spite if ever they met again. Mei expected anything , anything but this.

The raven-haired girl felt a smile form in her lips. She knew that it was wrong, but she felt happy to know that Yuzu still cared for her. Despite always hoping that the former blonde has moved on from her, knowing that the older girl still had her in her heart filled her with joy.

'I really am twisted,' Mei thought.

She snuggled closer into the former blonde. If Mei could stay in that moment forever she would.

"E-ehem..."

The two girls turned their head towards the direction of the cough.

"Ummm...I don't want to ruin your reunion guys but..." Nami said awkwardly as she gestured towards the small crowd that was forming around Mei and Yuzu.

"O-oh.." Yuzu said as she pulled away from Mei.

The step-sisters both had blushes that reached until the tip of their ears when they parted.

After the two recovered from their intense embarrassment, the three immediately went to less crowded place.

"Naa-chan, I almost forgot that you're here." Yuzu said with a light laugh as she scratched the back of her head.

The redhead held her chest and contorted her face into fake sadness. " After everything that we've been through, you just forgot about me?" The girl put her other hand on her face to wipe fake tears.

"Awww... there , there." The former blonde let out a small chuckle. She patted the shorter girl's head as she pulled the girl into a friendly hug.

Mei felt a stab of pain as she saw the scenario unfold. Maybe the girl was Yuzu's lover afterall, she thought. The raven-haired girl bit her lip as she felt jealousy fill her heart.

" Umm.. before I forget let me introduce you."Yuzu said as she pulled away from Nami.

" Naa-chan this is my li'l sister Mei, and Mei this is my friend Nami."

'Little sister?' Nami thought.

She was sure that the other girl was Yuzu's lover after the public display of affection they had earlier. And the taller girl's eyes were screaming how much she loves the raven-haired girl. She looked at the girl not in a sisterly-love kind of way but in a love-love kind of way.

' I was mistaken, I guess.'The girl shrugged.

The redhead then turned her head to face Mei.

"It's very nice to meet you!" she said enthusiastically and bowed her head.

"Likewise." Mei said coolly as she returned the gesture.

When their eyes met the redhead almost shivered at the cold gaze that other girl gave her. She's guessing that the raven-haired girl didn't like her that much. Nami just couldn't take the intense look that the girl was giving her so she turned her head downwards to look at her wristwatch.

"Oh look at the time!" The short girl exclaimed.

"Umm, guys...It's getting late so I should probably get home."

"Ooowww..." Yuzu pouted but her face suddenly lit up.

"But yeah, sure!Just promise that we'll hang-out again sometime!" The former blonde said cheerfully , failing to notice the tense atmosphere between Nami and Mei.

"Yeah. I promise. I gotta go , see you soon!"Nami waved goodbye to Yuzu and gave Mei a curt nod before she took off.

Yuzu watched the girl run with a small smile on her face. She was felt happy that she found a new friend.

"Naa-chan!" the former blonde called. The girl stopped running and turned her head.

" Thank you so much for accompanying me today, I had so much fun!" The former blonde shouted.

The girl gave Yuzu a bright smile and slightly nodded before she continued running.

" It seems like she's in a hurry." Yuzu said while chuckling.

The former blonde turned her head towards Mei when she felt the girl grab the hem of her shirt.

"M-Mei?"

The raven-haired girl looked directly into Yuzu's eyes.

"Yuzu , I need to talk to you."

* * *

 **I'm sorry that the chapter is super short but I swear that I'm gonna update tomorrow.**

 **Thank you so much for reading this. Ciao!**


	7. Chapter 7

**I apologize for the SUPER late update.**

* * *

" Would you like some tea, Mei?" Yuzu said with a smile.

"Yes , please. That would be highly appreciated." Mei replied as she bowed slightly at the older girl's offer.

Yuzu couldn't help but let out a small chuckle at the younger girl's formality. Others might find the girl's attitude off-putting, but Yuzu found it comforting. Even after the years they spent away from each other , Mei was still the same.

Without further ado, the older girl excused herself and went to the kitchen to prepare tea.

Yuzu gave Mei a quick glance before she poured the tea into a cup. Her apartment was small and dingy, but seeing the raven-haired girl inside of it makes the space seem special . Nostalgia filled Yuzu's heart. It's almost as if they were back in the apartment they used to share with their mother. A smile spread across her face as she remembered the moments they spent like this. The older girl didn't know what was going through her mind when she invited Mei over but she doesn't regret her decision.

Yuzu carefully carried the cups of tea she prepared and emerged from the kitchen. She smiled at Mei who was seated at the dinner table.

" Here's your tea.~" Yuzu cheerfully said as she placed one of the cups in front of Mei.

The raven-haired girl thanked Yuzu before she wrapped her hands around the warm cup. The older girl gave Mei a small nod and sat across her. Yuzu sipped at her own tea as she happily watched the younger girl.

Mei was already incredibly pretty during their high school years, but she grew even more beautiful than she was before. Yuzu resisted the urge to gape at the other girl. In her eyes, Mei looked like a goddess.

Yuzu felt her face heat up when she noticed the blush that was covering Mei's face, the girl must've noticed the intense look that Yuzu was giving her. When their eyes met she immediately turned her gaze downwards, she felt too embarrassed to look directly into Mei's eyes.

Yuzu's breathe hitched when her eye caught the silver ring that was wrapped around Mei's finger. She almost thought that it was the same ring that she had given the younger girl , but of course , it wasn't. She could already grasp the meaning behind the ring with just one glance. In just an instant the bubble that the former blonde created burst. Yuzu finally snapped back into reality. She closed her eyes tightly as the realization crept into her. Mei was already married.

In the past, when Yuzu first heard rumors that Mei was already living with a man named Udagawa, she thought it was just a mere coincidence that he had the same name as her former manager, but as it turns out, they were actually the same person.

At first , Yuzu felt mad, she felt angry at her fate. She felt as if the heavens were playing her. But as time went by, her anger turned into relief. Udagawa was a good person. He's very earnest and thoughtful , Yuzu saw all that in the small amount of time that she worked under him. She knows that the man wouldn't do anything that would hurt Mei.

Yuzu slowly opened her eyes and looked intently at the ring. It was so beautiful , its engravings were simple yet elegant. It must have cost a fortune. The former blonde smiled sadly, the ring she gave Mei, even though she spent a whole month doing part-time job to buy it , was nothing compared to the ring that the girl was wearing now.

"Your ring, it's really pretty." Yuzu said. The comment bore no ill will but it sounded sour. Deep within her heart, Yuzu felt envious. She was envious of the fact that Udagawa can give Mei everything that she couldn't. The man can give Mei not only an expensive ring , but he can also provide the life that the younger girl deserves.

Yuzu bit back the tears that was about to come. She lifted her head up and looked directly into Mei's eyes. She watched the younger girl's face contort into confusion and then into shame. The girl immediately hid her hands under the table.

Yuzu swallowed the lump in her throat. It required a lot of strength but she tried her best to speak." Since when?" she said weakly.

She wanted to hear the girl say it. She thought that maybe , just maybe, hearing Mei say that she was already married with someone else would make her snap out of it, that it would finally make her stop loving the girl.

Mei turned her head downwards because she felt too ashamed to look at the Yuzu , but mostly because she couldn't bear seeing the look in the other girl's eyes. It was full of hurt and anguish. The raven-haired girl felt regret. She should've ran away when she heard the girl call her, she shouldn't have returned the girl's embrace. She let her emotions get the best of her , and that's the reason why Yuzu is in so much pain. The girl was just laughing earlier but now she was filled with sadness.

"Please tell me ,Mei. I need to know."

Mei winced when she heard the desperation in Yuzu's voice. She already made up her mind that she will tell Yuzu the truth but it was a lot harder than she thought. Hearing the truth will hurt Yuzu but she deserves to know , Mei had kept it from her long enough.

"We got married just a few months after I turned 17." Mei said, her voice barely audible.

'Just a few months after she.." Anger slowly rose up in Yuzu but it was dulled by the stabbing pain against her chest. The older girl knows that there must've been a reason why Mei chose to hide the truth from her but Yuzu felt betrayed. She never would have thought that the ceremony happened just a few months after the girl left.

The tears that Yuzu was trying to hold back fell." I-Is that w-why you left? You c-could've at least told me, Mei." The girl said in between her sobs.

"W-Were you t-that eager to l-leave me?" Yuzu said with a sad voice.

Mei's heart broke when she heard the girl's question. She turned her head upwards to face the older girl.

"No , Yuzu it's not-"

Mei didn't finish her sentence. She clenched her teeth and exhaled deeply.

"Yuzu , I told grandfather." she whispered.

"I t-told him about us." Mei's voice was starting to waver.

She covered her face using her hand as she felt tears form in her eyes. They slowly fell as she remembered how her grandfather ridiculed what she felt towards Yuzu.

" I-I told him everything. How I felt about you and how I felt about my engagement." The raven-haired girl paused and wiped her tears using the back of her hand.

Yuzu stared at Mei with disbelief. She never would have thought that the girl would tell anyone about their relationship, much so if it were their grandfather. Yuzu felt admiration towards Mei.

"But he … He didn't accept my pleas. Grandfather was so outraged that he moved the ceremony into an earlier date. He even ordered me to stop associating with you and Mom."

The older girl's admiration quickly turned into disappointment.

She scoffed." You left because gramps told you to?"

Yuzu looked at Mei angrily" You just blindly followed his order without even think-"

"You don't understand , Yuzu!" Mei shouted before Yuzu could finish her sentence.

Something inside the former blonde snapped. She stood up and raised her hand to slap Mei.

But when she saw the girl close her eyes to brace herself , Yuzu retracted her hand. She bowed her head while tears fell from her eyes.

" I don't understand? Is it because you think I'm dumb and stupid? Or is it because you think that a lowly commoner like me would never comprehend the life of an Ojou-sama like you?" Yuzu said with a low voice.

The older girl raised her head and grabbed the collar of Mei's shirt. Yuzu pulled the girl up from her seat. " Do you even know what Mom went through when you left? It wasn't only me who got hurt Mei , you also hurt Mom." The girl said weakly. She felt furious , but she didn't have enough strength to raise her voice.

"You left without as much as a goodbye. You just… you just disappeared. Do you know how much that hurt?" Yuzu said as she weakly pushed Mei away. She remembered the first months when Mei left, how miserable she was during those times. The older girl felt her heart squeeze in pain. She recalled how hard it was for her to act normal when deep inside she was torn apart. The nights she spent crying and the days she spent waiting and hoping that the girl would come back, she remembered all the pain she went through when Mei left.

Yuzu gritted her teeth. "Was it really that easy for you to just leave?" Tears continue to fall from Yuzu's eyes. She tried to stop them from coming but it was useless.

" Is that how you perceive me to be?" Mei said as she took a step back from Yuzu, it was apparent in her voice that she was hurt.

The raven-haired girl pursed her lips together. She tried to stop the words that was about to come out of her mouth but she couldn't.

Mei clenched her fists and stared at the floor. " Do you really think that I found it easy to walk away from you and Mom?" she said with a stern voice.

" Leaving you behind filled me with agony, I never wanted to turn away from you." Mei put her hand on top of her chest. She gripped the ring that Yuzu gave her.

"If I could, I would have stayed by your side! But , I…. I didn't have a choice, Yuzu!" Mei shouted as she clutched the ring tighter.

Tears pooled in her eyes once again. Her grip on the ring loosened, she let her hand fall to her side." I didn't have a choice…." Mei repeated softly as she broke down into tears. A thud echoed in the small apartment when the girl's knees gave in. She drew sharp breaths , she was crying too much.

Yuzu's eyes widened when she saw the girl fall down. All the emotions she felt were replaced by concern. The older girl immediately ran towards the girl and sat down beside her.

She didn't know what to do. She wants the comfort the other girl, she wants to ease the pain that the girl was feeling but she doesn't know how. Yuzu slowly reached out and gently caressed the raven-haired girl's back. She can feel how hard Mei was shaking through her palm. Her heart sank, she hated seeing the girl like that.

"M-Mei , are you okay? Are y-you hurt? Do you need anything?" Yuzu asked in a panicked voice. She waited for the girl's reply but it never came. Yuzu grew more restless, she couldn't bear seeing Mei in that state, and she hated the fact that she couldn't do anything to help the girl.

" I'll g-get you a glass of water." Yuzu said as she clumsily stood up. She was just about to step away from Mei, but the girl weakly grabbed her wrist.

Yuzu turned her head back to look at Mei. The girl was directly looking into her eyes.

" I was happy, Yuzu." Mei said as she let go of Yuzu's wrist.

The girl looked at Yuzu lovingly." Every moment I spent with you filled me with warmth. They are my most cherished possessions."

Along with the pain that Mei feels was a sense of contentment. In spite of everything that she had lost, she knows that she would always have the memories that she and Yuzu shared.

Mei gave Yuzu a geniune smile." As wicked as I am , you still gave me love. You restored my relationship with my father and you taught me what it means to be truly alive. I cannot express how grateful I am for everything that you've done for me, Yuzu." the girl said tenderly.

The smile that was plastered on Mei's face slowly disappeared. " Despite all these , I..." Guilt flashed across her eyes.

" All I ever did was to cause you grief. And I... I couldn't give you the kind of love that you deserve." Mei said with a voice full of remorse. She can never forgive herself for causing Yuzu that much pain.

Mei shut her eyes and turned her head downwards. Droplets of her tears fell on the floor.

" Yuzu, I deeply apologize for everything. I'm so sorry.."

The raven-haired girl's eyes opened wide as she felt Yuzu's arms wrap around her. The former blonde's heart melted when she heard the girl's sentiments.

" Mei, don't apologize." Yuzu said. She held the girl's nape and pulled her closer.

" There's nothing we can do about it. I guess some things are just not meant to be." The words that came out of her mouth tore her apart but it was the truth. No matter how much it hurts , it was the reality. There is nothing they can do to change it.

" Yuzu.." Mei whispered as she buried her face against the older girl's neck.

Yuzu tightened her embrace when she felt the dampness of Mei's tears against her skin. Before she even realized it , tears were already falling from her eyes.

Yuzu and Mei didn't exchange words but they held onto each other for what seems like hours, they were both afraid to let go.

Their hearts twisted in pain as they slowly accepted the fact that there's no hope for the love that they have for each other. They cried until their tears ran dry as they whispered their farewell to the future wherein they were by each other's side.

The dream they both have where they got married, built a family and grew old together faded into nothingness.

.

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 **I know this chapter is sad but please don't kill me. I'll try to update this in a week or two. See ya.**


	8. this is not an update :(

*insert dramatic music*

It's been 84 years...

Hallo, hallo. I'm so sorry if I just disappeared on you guys, I'm not gonna lie I actually forgot about this and while I was thinking about life and contemplating my existence,just the usual, I suddenly remembered about this lol. I know, I know I'm such a fake fan.. I'm so sorry.. But now I'm here! And I want to ask y'all if you still want me to continue writing this or not. It's cool either way. That's all, byeeeeeee!


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